So Joy has this co-worker and friend Dolly. Dolly is a cool cat, especially since the first night I met her I got pretty damn hammered and she still invited me to her luau after I had tied one on. (In my defense, though, not only am I lovable sober, I am apparently even more lovable drunk. I’m just a lovable guy.)
So anywho, we’re at this bar down where Joy lives that night and the bar was D-E-A-D dead. The DJ, obviously tired of finding shit to play, started coming to me asking what we wanted to hear — which was no doubt brought on by me being the only one asking him to play songs.
Now Dolly being the youngest in our party of four — myself, Joy, Earl and her — had not heard a lot of songs I was throwing out there. It got to the point where I said in mock frustration, “That’s it. I’m making you a goddamn mix tape.”
Which I did. Four, actually. Two were already put together in the form of the CCRG Mix Tapes, one was a driving tunes mix of stuff she most likely hadn’t heard and one was an ’80s Prom mix.
The ’80s Prom mix consisted of:
- Can’t Fight This Feeling – Reo Speedwagon
- Faithfully – Journey
- Every Rose Has Its Thorn – Poison
- Time After Time – Cyndi Lauper
- Love Walks In – Van Halen
- Fly To The Angels – Slaughter
- Is This Love – Whitesnake
- When The Children Cry – White Lion
- Sister Christian – Night Ranger
- Headed For A Heartbreak – Winger
- Heaven – Warrant
- Toy Soldiers – Martika
- The Ballad Of Jayne – L.A. Guns
- Love Bites – Def Leppard
- Carrie – Europe
- Fly High Michelle – Enuff Z’nuff
- Never Say Goodbye – Bon Jovi
- Edie (Ciao Baby) – The Cult
- Open Arms – Journey
Now, in order salvage what little man points I have left, note that there’s no Chicago or Air Supply on there. I’ll give you Cyndi Lauper, though. I tried to stick mostly with the power ballads from ROCKERS. But, yeah, I will concede the man points because I didn’t have to go hunting for any of those. They are all in my collection. I HAVE SOME SLAYER, TOO, DAMMIT!
A few days after I gave Dolly the CDs, I get a call from Joy.
“Can you hear that?” She puts the phone up in the air (obviously).
“You listening to my awesome mixes?” I asked.
“Yeah. That prom one is really good. I remember some of those from my prom. But you shouldn’t have put ‘Open Arms’ on there.”
“Why not?” I’m thinking that’s one of the quintessential prom songs.
“Because that wasn’t played at any prom.”
“Are you fucking high? Of course it was.”
“No it wasn’t! It’s about SEX! They wouldn’t play a song about sex at prom, dumb ass. You didn’t even go to prom, so you wouldn’t even know. Loser.”
“You’re insane. That is sure as hell a prom song.”
“No it isn’t.”
“Yes it is.”
“Whatever. You’re retarded. I gotta go.”
We were still arguing about it this past weekend. Over a month later.