Marry, Fuck, Kill…

Part one of Dorkapalooza ’08 is here, in case you are just joining in.

So Friday morning we work at the butt crack of dawn (5:30ish) to get on the road to Dallas, TX.

The 10 hour drive was pretty uneventful. Most of the time was spent playing “Marry, Fuck, Kill” (which is more fun than you would think), and spotting such awesome places like…

It’s little off the wall family joints like Cooter Brown’s that make road trips awesome.

The purpose of heading to Dallas, aside from a pretty cool road trip, was the Texas Fear Fest. A horror convention that the guests included Robert Englund (Freddy Krueger, people!), Heather Langenkamp and John Saxon, amongst others. Basically, it was a reunion show for A Nightmare on Elm Street, A Nightmare on Elm Street 3, and A Nightmare on Elm Street 4. There were a lot of guests.

In addition, there were people there from Fright Night (I saw Marcy from “Married with Children”! :lol:), Gage from Pet Sematary (who, when he got smacked by the 18 wheeler, looked just like my nephew at that age…FREAKY), Alex Vincent (Chucky’s friend-to-the-end, Andy, in Child’s Play) and a slew of other people.

But having seen a lot of these people at various conventions already — and not willing to pay the $35 to get something signed by Robert England — I only wanted to get three autographs while was out there: John Saxon, Neil Marshall and Henry Thomas. I missed out on Saxon, but Marshall and Thomas I snagged. Best part? They were the only two guests there that were signing for free. Bonus.

That’s me with Neil Marshall (director of Dog Soldiers, The Descent and Doomsday). All of his movies start with D because they are DYNAMITE!

The hottie lady is Axelle Carolyn Marshall, the special makeup effects artist on Doomsday. We share a birthday. I should have told her that and she would have dropped Neil for me for sure! Oh, and not only were they not charging for signatures, they were giving out posters for Doomsday. I heart those Marshalls.

That there is me and Henry Thomas of E.T.: The Extra-Terrestrial fame. This was his first appearance at a show, and he looked really uncomfortable. Kind of like he didn’t know why all these people wanted his autograph. He looks scared. Like I’m going to kill him or something.

When I gave him my copy of Dead Birds to sign, he said, “Oh, wow. No one’s had me sign one of these. Did you watch it?”

“Absolutely. I loved it.”

“Great, thanks, man. I appreciate it.”

Yeah. Not the most fascinating conversation in the history of man, I know. But it was with Henry “Cloak and Dagger” Thomas, so eat it, fuckers. 😆

I spent the most of the time aimlessly wandering the con, looking at goth girls (at least the four hot ones that were there), talking to low-budget filmmakers (five new reviews coming) and getting free swag (thanks for the hoodie, FearNet!). Oddly enough, of the swag I got, the FearNet hoodie is my favorite, and they gave it to me because I told them I hated their logo popping up during their movie presentations. I have a lot of respect for the FearNet representative I talked to, as he seemed really receptive to my thoughts and he said they would look into it. He may be giving me spin, but he gave me cool things, so I don’t care.

Oddly, I spent very little money at the con. Usually, I spend tons of coin at these things, but there weren’t a lot of vendors and I basically have seen everything to see at these shows (it’s either the same vendors, or the same things being sold). I did, however, finally get a hoodie I’ve been wanting since I saw at the HorrorFind con this past August (I would it have bought it then, but Jill, the owner, was sold out of fatboy XL).


Back. Cool. I hate those little bitches.

Two of the coolest things I saw while in Dallas:

1. A store called “Caskets”. It sold caskets. Directly beside that store, in the same font, was a sign that said “Boxes 2 Go”. I still laugh at that.

2. A store called “Condoms To Go”. It sold condoms. To go.

Thus ends part two. But I’m not done with Texas yet. There was another reason why we headed out there, and I’ll get into that with the next entry. If you know where this is going, or have an idea, you go ahead and keep it to yourself. I don’t want you stepping on my shit. 😀

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Sparkling Red

Goth girls are an odd bunch. I hung out in goth clubs for a while because some of my friends went down that road in university. The girls seemed to be either horribly unattractive or super-hot, with nothing in between. I was never sufficiently goth for these places, and the goth snobs looked down their noses at me. I thought that they should get over themselves.

[…] So here comes Dorkapalooza ‘08 part three.  (Part one and part two). […]

[…] we last left the Dorkapalooza ‘08 tour (part one, two and three), we were leaving to Kingsland, Texas, for one of the final legs of our journey (and one […]